Aged Ballot Watcher Doing Sluggish, Confused Job Of Intimidating Voters

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LEAGUE CITY, TX—Noting that the clearly flustered man had zero concept what to do or say, native voter Raleigh Jenkins advised reporters Tuesday that the aged ballot watcher he encountered was doing a gradual, confused job of intimidating voters. “This morning, what ought to have been a really quick course of took ceaselessly as a result of the right-wing extremist tasked with patrolling my polling place barely knew how one can disenfranchise me or anybody else in line,” stated Jenkins, including that in a really perfect world, he would have proven as much as forged his vote; gotten pushed round by an armed, masked man in a bulletproof vest; after which been again in his automotive in 5 to 10 minutes. “As a lot as I recognize him displaying up and attempting to face in the best way of democracy, the outdated man may barely level his gun at my brow and stored forgetting what he was saying in regards to the 2020 election being stolen from Donald Trump by the Democratic cabal. Truthfully, I virtually felt dangerous for the man. It took him 45 minutes simply to name his militia and ask if he ought to kill the man in entrance of me for supposedly committing voter fraud.” At press time, Jenkins advised reporters that he was in the end simply grateful he made it to work on time, as a result of as he was leaving, the aged ballot watcher noticed a Black voter, clutched his chest, and collapsed.

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